THE CONSTANT STREAM OF NOWS

The future is a strange and distant place
Can’t picture me so travelled and a stranger
It happens in my sleep before I notice
Urban dictionary slang is parlance then passé

The past hurt so I prejudge the future
Already guilty of crimes uncommitted
Knowingly I fear the bad unhappened
The good to be is out of reach, unlikely

In the process I miss the now
The elusive Shrodinger’s eel that slips between my fingers
Changed present to past by mere observation

The measuring of some things changes their wait
Unmeasurables defy the analysts but everybody buys
Better to feel the constant stream of nows

ADOPTEE

At home I knew it was there, my file.
I would walk past the room with the desk with the drawer
My history slightly creased.

A lifetime of avoidance
A moment of acceptance
At last I held it
No longer fantasy, a princess? a hero?
Interest had seemed disloyal to mum and dad
Now nobody could see the feigned indifference

Envelope innards, so few?
Why not a telephone directory of detail in small print.
My life on these scraps.
Typewriter ink on paper.
Signatures of my blood.
Dont do it!
‘I give this child away’

This is for Writing 201:Poetry
Prompt – Drawer
Device – Apostrophe

WHERE I PUT MY ANGER (A BAD DAY)

Getting up I feel uneasy,
Off to work just keep going.

Through the morning rude white knuckles
Nearly lunchtime just keep working.

No tolerance for empty chatter.
Is it anger? Just keep moving.

Jealous me or boastful colleagues?
Doesn’t matter just keep breathing.

Sharpened edges hurt my vision,
Angry filter just keep filming.

Nearly done, lost aspirations.
Mediocre, just keep working.

Hours over, head for home,
Re-run failures just keep running.

Rapid cycles, anger, numbness.
Guilty! Useless! Just keep peddling.

STOP!

No more movement, turn it inwards,
Unspent forces wrapped in fuse wire.

Head exploding close the hatches
Black collapsing, world compressing.

All that matter, down to pin size,
Tiny dot holds all my feelings.

Gone… ?

This is for Writing 201:Poetry
Ballade
Epistrophe

THE ANIMAL KNOWS BEST

The human ignores the stiffening of the back under threat,
Tightening of the chest at unkindness
The urge to run at the distant rumble
The animal raises its hackles, growls and crawls to its den staying safe
The human hears only judgement
Believes the world is perfect and itself damaged
The animal knows the world is dangerous
The animal knows best

This is for Writing201:Poetry

Trust ?

Bleary from moonshine meds made in the still of my brain
The spirit isn’t proof enough for the silence of now
Filtering out insufficient sharp reality
Dangerous waters of connection are left unswum
I stay in the dark chamber
Padded from the fading film of cine reel, real life.

 

This is for Writing201:Poetry, prompt was Trust